Pitching To Agents: First Bite

Dear lovely people,

I have an agent’s request for more material! How exciting. How incredibly thrilling! How amazingly nervous I am!

The agent, Jackie Lindert, requested the first three chapters of Honey Ko. I sent them off in an email a few minutes ago. Here’s the pitch that earned the request:

“Tom Nelson, tethered to apron strings stretching nine-thousand miles around the world, worries that his status-conscious mother will be horrified by his choice of fiancée, Filipino barmaid Aida Pinoy. His worry balloons into doubt that he can remain faithful, and fear of what his friends will think of his interracial marriage. Aida doesn’t care – she wants a decision, and marriage!”

I want to give a shout out to Steve Giese, who expressed concern that my reworked pitch seemed more like a movie tagline than a pitch to an agent. In this case, he was right. I’m glad this is the pitch I used. Thanks, Steve! 🙂

What, you ask, did I do before I sent the email with the requested chapters? Well, I’ll tell you. First, I posted the news on my Facebook page. Of course. Then I drafted the email, carefully making sure I had the agent’s name correct, and the right information in the subject line. Next, I opened with a thank you for the request, added my original pitch (as requested), and indicated the three chapters were embedded in the body of the email, rather than as attachments, out of concerns for security (as noted on the agent’s website).

I signed off with another thanks. Then I spellchecked the email and reviewed the whole thing over again. Okay, okay. I know you know I reviewed the darn thing multiple times. I can’t help it. It’s a wonder I ever finish anything.

So, as we breathe in and out – multiple times…my three chapters are flying through the ether and, hopefully, alighting in Jackie’s virtual in-basket where she will find them and…find them worthy of my full manuscript.

Fingers crossed, my dear lovelies.

Until next time,



3 thoughts on “Pitching To Agents: First Bite

  1. Good luck with it all. I can now see where Honey Ko is going story wise. I am excited, as I hinted in my last comment that I wasn’t sure how far you were going into their lives. Very excited I may add.


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